quotes tagged with 'involved'

You might expect that if you spent such an extended period in twelve different households, what you would gather is twelve different ideas about how to raise children:  there would be the strict parents and the lax parents and the hyperinvolved  parents and the mellow parents and on and on. What Lareau found, however, is something much different. There were only two parenting "philosophies," and they divided almost perfectly along class lines. The wealthier parents raised their kids one way, and the poorer parents raised their kids another way.


The wealthier parents were heavily involved in their children's free time, shuttling them from one activity to the next, quizzing them about their teachers and coaches and teammates... That kind of intensive scheduling was almost entirely absent from the lives of the poor children. (In the poor children's lives) what a child did was considered by his or her parents as something seperate from the adult world and not particularly consequentential.


Lareau calls the middle-class parenting style "concerned cultivation." It's an attempt to actively "foster and assess a child's talents, opinions and skills." Poor parents tend to follow, by contrast, a strategy of "accomplishment of natural growth." They see it as their responsibility to care for their children, but to let them grow and develop on their own.


Lareau stresses that one style isn't morally better than the other. The poorer children were, to her mind, often better behaved, less whiny, more creative in making use of their own time, and had a well-developed sense of independence. But in practical terms, concerted cultivation has enormous advantages. The heavily scheduled middle-class child is exposed to a constantly shifting set of experiences. She learns teamwork and how to cope in highly structured settings. She is taught how to interact comfortably with adults, and to speak up when she needs to....


By contrast the working-class and poor children were characterized by "an emerging sense of distance, distrust, and constraint.

Author: Malcom Gladwell, Source: Outliers, pp.102-104Saved by mlsscaress in children parenting attention focus family home balance involved entitlement adapt indepence 11 years ago[save this] [permalink]

Many of you know what I am talking about when I talk of “hosanna moments," those transcendent moments in our lives when, without warning, we are overwhelmed by a close encounter with eternity, a surprise of the spirit–those moments when, while engaged in the temporal rhythms of our daily and earth- encrusted lives, comfortably duped by familiar routines, we are suddenly brought face-to-face with the holy, swept by the Spirit of God into a transcendent reality, overwhelmed by undeniable evidence of a literal Father in Heaven who knows you and knows me and is somehow interested and involved in our lives. The "We'll-Sing-and-We'll-Shout" moment is that moment when our God, Brother-of-Jared-ing us, reaches his hand through the veil to startle our sensibilities, to reassure, to comfort, to guide, to prod, to change our course. Then our spirits soar, our souls are renewed, and we can never really be the same again.

Author: Richard H. Cracroft, Source: BYU Devotional 29 June 1993, de Jong Concert HallSaved by mlsscaress in knowledge holyghost involved evidence moment awareness interested surprise whisper renewed 11 years ago[save this] [permalink]
Next to family and Church, the community probably has the most powerful influence on an individual's moral sensibilities. The moral standards of a community determine the nature of the entertainment allowed and the types of magazines and books sold in the community. In fact, U.S. courts of law use prevailing community standards to judge whether or not materials are pornographic.

...If we choose to overlook or ignore our community responsibilities, we may well be abdicating control of the influences on our families to others. Our standards and values can be an influence for good in our community-but only when we become involved and share that influence.
Author: ?, Source: Preparing Children for their Community Roles, Ensign Aug 1988. p 59. (Handbook for Families)Saved by mlsscaress in media influence family standards community morals involved informed 12 years ago[save this] [permalink]
“Jesus also said that we ought to be friendly with each other. He said, “A new commandment I give unto you, that ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.” (john 13:34). Because the creator recognized love & friendship as one of our needs, he gave us a natural, instinctive desire to try to satisfy it. That is, everyone hungers for appreciation. We have a natural need to be loved, and everyone wants to feel that his own life is worthwhile. One of the most devastating of all human emotions is the sense of being alone, of being unloved, and of being unimportant. The feeling of not being wanted, of not being worthy, of not being important is causing far too much distress in our civilization and among our church membership.
We need each other. This means that we should bring everyone into full church membership and into full church fellowship & activity. The fact that the Lord has told us to do it is an indication that he thinks we can do it if we will. We might inquire of ourselves why we don’t.”
Author: Sterling W. Sill, Source: Leadership, Vol III. Bookcraft SLC 1978. pp241-242Saved by mlsscaress in love friendship appreciation needs alone wanted involved 13 years ago[save this] [permalink]

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